A certain conversation at the workplace sparked some thoughts which I played around with the entire of yesterday. What took me so long to bring down those curtains to finally see the other side of things?
As the day went by, I experienced 3 encounters with fellow sisters of the same faith going through ordeals relating to this feeling called love.
I pondered on the feeling. The actions that surround it. And the reasons why it manifests.
This post might sound like a confused soul throwing ideas everywhere. But it is after all a place I pen down my thoughts and maybe, you can join in this thought-process too! (You have been warned)
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I heard you.
Love should never be constrained.
It is a universal feeling for everyone to cherish and thus, for others to dictate who we can or can’t love defies the very belief we hold dearly – that discrimination should never have to exist. Love is this huge arms that hugs all of us, no matter who or where we come from.
It is applaudable how you have managed to hide behind those sweet pink banners, enchanting words that have brought an excited congregation of individuals who stand together in the name of love. It is applaudable until you reveal that your definition must include a love that kills.
A love that kills is exactly how you’ve presented it to us. It disobeys nature through unnatural acts, it demolishes the sacred institution called family which generations have tried to build and ultimately goes against what God has set upon us.
Physically, we are made to complement – a male and a female. You’ve acknowledged that, but you went on anyway to fulfill your desires. You said that girls don’t give you the fun that you feel as compared to when you are with your same sex partner.
How about the gays who both adopt the “girl” partner role. Doesn’t that paint you as someone who deep down, clearly yearns for a female counterpart?
Heck, the fact that you assign roles as to who is the guy partner and who gets to become the girl, I wonder why make do with such labels if you have embraced a linear, confusing way to define yourselves?
I do not shun away those who practise this or those who have been tested to feel that way. It is your battle. Allah knows you are strong to face it. However, I refuse to accept such actions. Even if you do not subscribe to any religion, how can you allow for such acts to stay rampant while so many social issues arise? Why confuse ourselves further when nature has provided clear evidence that a male will need a female and vice versa? The identity that you seek, has been laid out. Let’s open our hearts to find the Truth…
I am not well versed in this and it is not as simple as I’ve painted the issue to be but it has been quite sometime and is still running through my mind.
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The heart and whatever it carries in it are wondrous yet also monstrous when left unchecked. Think of something you adore dearly. Would you leave it for harm to consume them before retrieving it back in our embrace? Would you as a parent allow your child to walk on the crossroads in life without any preparation for it? Why do you think we need a licence to drive and that suffocating seat belt? Why is our sunny island Singapore so full of rules. We’re literally drowning in them!
Why oh why do you think, Allah has sent down messengers and a Guidebook for?
Allah loves us.
He gave us guidelines so that we can come back home, to jannah, in smiles. It is to keep His beloved ones safe. Today, tomorrow and forever.
But to follow these rules, to internalise whatever strings of command He has for us is definitely not easy. Especially in today’s context.
At the time when everybody is doing a certain action, does not mean that it is fine.
In contrast, at the time when nobody is doing it, does not mean that it is wrong.
Even if your friends and close relatives are doing it, it does not mean Allah allows it. A Muslim should know that it is time we become a stranger, a ghuraba.
I sometimes feel ever so helpless looking at how the world works, how my own community strives and how I personally move so slow to help them, and above all, to improve myself.
Humans are definite beings but with constant fleeting moves. Social norms change over time but Allah’s standards do not. I believe with this overwhelming feeling of helplessness, one should return to the only life support, the ever constant one.
Seek in the ever constant, the One that will stand the test of time. With Him are the foundations, with Him are what will keep you rooted and clear on the only road needed to travel on. The road to Jannah.
Let people shove their ideals on what love is and what it entails.
If they think love needs a constant dinner for two before nikah,
a perceived harmless ride home alone with him from the mosque,
constant how are yous over social media,
telling the whole world about him when nothing is confirmed…
Let them. But never leave them. At times, Allah sent these people as a reminder for yourself. You might be confused, you might have that desire to prove. Let go, Let God. (copyright title Ustaz Mizi oops).
Let people run away from what they think is a social stigma.
After all, you’re meant to defy social norms. Norms that go against Allah’s.
So dear self,
Dear sisters,
Dear everyone,
Do we want to merely race against time to prove our short-lived feelings or would we want an everlasting love? A love that transcends our limited number of days on Earth so that it will continue in the hereafter…If so, proper measures have to take place. If so, then we should do well to gain Allah’s redha…
Before I end, I would like to share this song which I think describes this post well. A post that touches on how too much freedom to love, actually kills (it doesn’t explicitly say but sastera has taught one to reflect between the lines). Love needs guidance as we would never want our loved ones to get hurt, to fall a great fall. Love needs sacrifices that will prove our words into actions. Love needs support that can stand the test of time and none other than Allah, can do that.
This song is for my fellow brothers and especially, my sisters in Islam. This ummah that we care for, needs to be built upon solid foundations. This ummah can’t afford to have love built other than His sake. A love that is not modeled on the “freedom to love” agenda but based on Allah’s definition and guidance.
“Sebelum diijabkabulkan, syariat tetap membataskan.”
Ya Allah, peliharalah kami, keluarga kami dan insan-insan yang kami cintai.
Diarinsyirah 